We have always heard of emails from Nigeria, South Africa or some other African countries about the desperate need of help they are in.. that his/her father expired when they were still young and now are being very badly treated by the society or watever.. n that they have a lot of money in their bank account which they want to transfer to us here in India.. so that we can take that amount and deliver it to them as they cant withdraw the money at their places coz of some problems.. or watever.. most of the time, its a girl who sends mails like these.. n even i've got such mails quite a few times...
But this mail abt an employment offer that I got yesterday from a Shalu Gupta.. allegedly from LG Electronics India Limited is the first of that sort I've ever got.. i've always heard abt such things.. but was really "happy" that I got one too.." :D
This is wat the mail said...
DEAR APPLICANT
WE ARE PLEASANT TO INFORM YOU THAT YOUR C.V HAS BEEN SHORT LISTED FROM NAUKRI.COM .SO READ CARE FULLY THE ATTACH FILE
THANK YOU
This is it.. this is wat the mail said.. just the few lines in the beginnin followed by 2 attachments.. before u read furthur, pls save the 2 images and read them completely...
Though there's nothin of much importance in the first one, the second one had me laughin for a long long time.. these are the lines that made me do so...
You are selected according to your resume in which Project you have worked on according to that you have been selected in the Company. --- wat...?? wat did you say...?? this is probably one of those lengthy sentences we come across and we take some time to understand.. but unfortunately here, i'm still not able to understand... someone pls help me here.. :P (however, I wud appreciate the guy who created this page.. he has the knowledge to address the company as Company with a capital "C" even without mentionin "LG will be hereafter addressed as Company"..)
You will be pleased to know that Company has advise you in the selection panel that your Application can be progress to final stage. --- Ha ha ha.. one more sentence like that.. but I was able to decode this one.. n here they want me to attempt the 15th question of KBC directly even without answerin 1 to 14.. great...!!
You will come to Company corporate office in Noida. Your call letter with AIR Ticket will be send to you by Company HRD. --- Yea.. one more thing to add to the excitement.. AIR ticket eh.. a**holes...
Now comes the most important of all..
First you have to deposit the (Cash) as an initial amount of Rs 4570/- through any ICICI Bank Branch from your Home City to our communication Department's head , Account NO 088801500945 - Name of Miss. Shalu Gupta. --- wats so special abt 4570 here.. how did u arrive at that number huh... was also wonderin why r they askin only 4570 here.. is that enough....!!!?
This is refundable interview security both of condition you select or not. --- I select or not.. really...?? you give me the choice of selection eh...?? :P
Your offer letter with air tickets will be send to your Home Address by courier after receiving the confirmation of interview security deposited in ICICI BANK. --- note the bank name underlined here..
The designation and Job Location will be fixing by Company HRD at the time of final process. --- fixing.. like wat.. match fixing...??
Your call letter will dispatch very shortly after receiving your confirmation of cash deposited in ICICI BANK. --- damn you.. the bank's name in caps and underlined again.. this is the third time they mention the bank.. guess the bank's got a hand in this.. that desperate eh...
You have to give the information after deposited the security money in to this email id :- lgelectronic@usa.com --- rotfl.. i couldnt control here.. lgelectronic@usa.com.. wat an email id.. huh.. dumb idiots.. dont you even have a small part of brain left in ur head...!!??
NOTE:- AFTER CONFIRMATION YOU HAVE TO SEND ME THE SCAN COPY OF PAYMENT SLIP BANK --- yea yea.. sure will do...
I jus couldnt resist but call up the numbers mentioned there.. n as usual one of the numbers was temporarily disconnected.. but damn.. i wanted some fun.. took the risk of callin the other one too.. followin is the conversation i had..
Me - Hi, I've got an email saying I have a job interview offer from LG Electronics..
Guy at the other end - Ya.. (was expectin a girl's voice.. but heard a guy's.. gotcha.. u made my day.. i'm gonna have a lot of fun now)
Me - Could I speak to Ms. Shalu Gupta.
Guy - She is busy. Please tell me how can I help you.
Me - Ya.. can u pls tell me what the job offer is about...??
Guy - This is recriutment for new LG plant at Noida...
Me - Ohh ok.. may I know who am I speaking to...??
Guy - This is RK Gupta, partner of Shalu Gupta.. (uh huh.. good.. family business eh..)
Me - Ohh I see.. you work for LG too...??
Guy - Yes.. I am the HR of the LG (yes.. "the HR of the LG".. these were the exact words that he said.. ha ha ha.. omg.. i cant believe this.. i'm talkin to the seniormost HR guy at LG..)
Me - Great.. could you please tell me the whole procedure of selection sir...??
Guy - Sorry, I'm very busy now.. the procedure is mention in the mail (ohh really..?? i never read that.. n obviously ya.. u're the HR of the LG.. u must b busy..)
Me - OK ya.. i understand.. you're the HR of the LG.. i'll read the mail.. can u pls tell me how you arrived at the amount of Rs 4570..??
Guy - That is a company confidential information.. we will tell you when you come here to attend the interview.. (uh huh.. u still expect me to come to Noida huh... poor u..)
Me - No problem sir.. and how do I get a confirmation that you've received the amount that I deposit in your account...??
Guy - You need to scan the payment slip and send it to the email id mentioned.. (i know that damnit.. i'm askin abt confirmation frm your end..)
Me - Ohh ya.. that lgelectronic@usa.com.. is it...??
Guy - Yes.. (u say Yes for this too a**hole..!!?? cant u still see wat i'm gettin at..)
Me - But how do I get a confirmation from your end sir...?? (i'm not gonna leave u until u answer my question)
Guy - We will reply to the email about confirmation.. (uh huh.. lgelectronic@usa.com has that feature too eh.. :P)
Me - Ohh i see.. good.. Can I talk to Ms. Shalu Gupta for furthur details...?? (to irritate him even more..)
Guy - Sorry.. she's very busy.. if you want any more details, please send a mail to us.. (blip.. he cut the call.. probably wasnt ready to take any more..)
I had the best 5 minutes of the day.. through out the conversation, the guy was speakin with the typical north indian accent.. n in a very hurried manner.. so it was much more funnier that u can imagine.. n naturally he was busy as he was the HR of the LG... u kno...
So please go ahead.. call the numbers mentioned there if you wanna have some fun... n let me know if u talk to Ms. Shalu huh..
I better get goin now.. gotta deposit some money to an ICICI Noida account u kno... :P
